Steve Pavlina Conscious Growth Workshop: 1.5 Months Later

By Sonya Sidky

November 23, 2009

It has been about a month and a half since I returned from the Conscious Growth Workshop (CGW) in Las Vegas. Since then, I have made several concrete improvements in my life. I feel good about waiting until this late date to provide a review, because what happens after such a workshop is every bit as important if not more important than what took place during the workshop. Yes—I made great connections at the workshop, but was I able to maintaining them? Yes, I had great insights at the workshop, but was I able to act upon them? Yes, I felt great at the workshop, but was I able to sustain and build upon that?

If you did not attend CGW #1 and are considering attending CGW #2, this article is geared towards you. I answer the questions above by mainly focusing on what actions I have taken since the workshop. There are other reviews available in the forums and other attendee’s websites that provide a day by day description of the workshop and extracurricular activities. My goal with this article is to give you a sense of what you could expect to accomplish at CGW #2 and if you do decide to go, I have included suggestions on how to prepare ahead of time as well. I will be taking my own advice since I am attending CGW #2. I am so excited to have a “do over” so that I can refine participation as well as propel myself to the next level.

Getting Results

Near the beginning of the workshop, Steve discussed the importance of taking actions that would improve your chances for manifesting your desired outcome. What actions can you take right now that will change your predictions about the future? Steve came full circle at the end of the workshop by discussing how to change your life by changing your predictions. You currently are living on planet A but you want to live on plant B. How do you disconnect from your current reality (planet A) and connect with your ideal future (planet B)?

Before I tell you how I answered these questions and have proceed in the month and a half following the workshop, let me briefly explain the written exercises we did during the workshop and how that relates to how I defined plant A and planet B for myself. On day 1, Steve provided a comprehensive overview of the principals of Truth, Love, and Power that are covered in his book and we completed exercises in each of these areas. Then on days 2 and 3 we assessed our current alignment with the principals of Truth, Love, Power, Oneness, Authority, Courage, and Intelligence in each of the following areas: Career & Work; Money & Finances; Health & Physical Body; Mental Development & Skills; Habits & Daily Routine; Emotions; Social Life and Relationships; and Spiritual Development. We were also asked to write out how we could improve our alignment based on each principal for each area. If my math is correct, that means on days 2 and 3 we completed 112 different pieces of our self-assessment:

Given my personality type, I have to admit, that the exercises got to be a bit repetitive. I wanted variety! My responses began the blur as we progressed through the exercises. I was no longer distinguishing between my Money & Finances and my Habits & Daily Routine or between the principle of Authority and that of Courage. I was coming up with similar responses in many of the categories towards the end and it was fatiguing. That said, I hereby acknowledge that it was not Steve Pavlina’s job to entertain Sonya Sidky. Sure much of the conference was in fact entertaining, but that was not the purpose. I felt that the exercises did their job by cementing in my psyche the pattern of issues that I had that were keeping me tied to planet A. I am the one who was responsible for the repetitive pattern of behaviors that kept showing up in the exercises. Hmmm—it comes as a surprise to me that I can actually be responsible for boring myself with these repetitive patterns, because overall I think I am an interesting person! I did not really learn anything new on an intellectual level from the exercises, but I did get to feel the impact of my actions on a deeper level. Thus the exercises helped me come to terms with how I truly viewed planet A and made it more evident what steps I would need to take to get to planet B. So I began to distill all that repetition into a plan of action and on the last day of the conference I recorded (audio journaling) the steps I would need to take in order disconnect from planet A and connect to planet B. Here is what I initially came up with:

1) Disconnect from my current career. I wanted to do this smoothly over several months to a year by treating my current job as a project position.

2) Incorporating the assistance of consultants, either by hiring people to help me or by trading services.

3) Act the way I would if I were already living on Planet B. Steve talked a lot about incorporating a lot of detail into your experience of planet B. How would you feel, what would you eat? What kind of clothing would you wear? This strategy fits well into a special type of journaling that I started to do in April and that has been very effective for me in overcoming fears and losing weight. I will save the details of my method for another time.

In the month and a half following the CGW, I have taken big steps to disconnect from planet A and to connect to planet B. I have more credibility with myself in believing that my current actions will get me to planet B. I spoke my boss about my goal of becoming permanently unemployed in 2010. I now take actions at work that are consistent with wrapping up my duties and transitioning them to other people. I am also simplifying some processes and documenting others. I am cleaning up my paper files, my electronic files and my email. I am careful not to take on new projects that interfere with my ultimate goal of leaving within a year. I am spending more of my time working on projects that are consistent with my interest and values, such as joining the wellness committee at work. I am also becoming more vocal about my aspirations and lifestyle at work.

As far as #2 goes, I thought that my first 30-day trial upon returning to Madison would be to talk to a least one consultant or vendor a day to get over my block around getting help in areas such as finances, life coaching, house cleaning, taking care of my house etc., however it became clear to me that I needed to ease into getting help a little more gently. Furthermore given that my vision of planet B included blogging and excluded having a job, I needed to start posting material to my website and get over my perfection complex. A central part of my life purpose is to act as a conduit where there is the illusion of separation. This is hard to do when I am blocking myself from communicating effectively!

I am happy to report that “The boss of me” 30-day trial was very effective in addressing my perfection complex and has resulted in my updating my website with new material every day for 30 days. I previously had not posted anything to my website since August of 2008! In addition, some of the mini-challenges that were included in this 30-day trial, addressed the issue on my hiring people to help me. This past weekend, I had a cleaning service come in and clean my house for the first time in my life! This may not seem like a big deal to you, but it was for me! I got over my block of paying someone to do something that I thought I should do myself and having someone else handle my stuff. As an added bonus, these two very talented ladies organized some of my closets and other living areas. They did for me in a four hour period of time something that I simply am not wired to do for myself regardless of how much time you gave me. I cannot wait to have one of the ladies come back and help me organize the rest of the house. I believe that both overcoming my perfection complex and inviting others to help me, both of which involve some element of giving up control are huge steps in propelling me towards planet B. My planet A control freakish actions would only hold me back.

As for #3, I am doing a lot of meditating on how planet B looks for me. I am also discussing it in detail with others. Every time you explain yourself to others it becomes more real. Before the workshop, I did not talk a lot about my desire to create a raw food website and to coach people to take their lifestyle to the next level, but during and after the workshop I had plenty of opportunity to develop such a picture of planet B. One huge factor that cannot be over stated is how the workshop literally handed to me on a silver platter the friendships that I want to experience on planet B. I do not need to use my imagination to create images of future friends because these connections have already manifested. When I am on planet B, I am free and I am exploring spiritual endeavors, eating a raw food diet, traveling, exploring dreams and connecting with others with the same interests. Well at the workshop there they were! There was an abundance of people who shared the same interests. Please don’t take this that we were all clones of each other and into the same things in any sort of cultish way. That simply was not the case. It just is not that common when as a raw foodist you can go to a non-raw food workshop and find so many people who share your diet.

Now I keep in touch with my friends via, Facebook, email and Skype and look forward to seeing many of them again in January. I am confident that I will have other connections with workshoppers as well. It is likely that I will see some of them at future raw food events for example or maybe a lucid dream workshop. I see my planet B reflected in them and I am also thrilled to contribute to them by seeing them as their planet B. Note to all you folks who are on the fence about going to the workshop—here is why you do choose to go. If you create a planet B for yourself that may seem foreign to you and others in your current planet A, you go to the workshop to project your planet B and have others reflect that back to you!!! When you go back home you may also find that you attract the time of connections that you want in your life more easily. This has certainly been the case with me although I have definitely experienced a learning curve when it comes to relating to my fellow human beings since the workshop. I am playing a bigger game now so I expect to experience a few bumps here and there.

Overall, I believe that my experiences at the workshop propelled me to take action that I would not otherwise of taken. Somehow the combination of the workshop, the continued interactions with workshoppers and the Lefkoe exercise has allowed me to release my perfection complex in a way that feels foreign and different to me. In other words, my current actions were not inevitable—I could have failed overall, but instead I plunged into action and have had SEVERAL failures along the way:)

Love and Connection

During one of our breaks Steve asked us to go out into the world and act weird in order to exercise our courage. We had already completed a group exercise on authority in which we tested our authority by asking the other people in our small groups to do crazy things. So I went out by the pool area at Harrah’s and a fellow workshopper was finishing up saying something to a hotel employee who was sporting a red outfit. I went up to the employee and began a friendly conversation. Then I told the employee who was dressed from head to toe in red, that I loved his blue shirt. I remained very friendly and said my goodbyes as I was ready to move on. The man responded well to the compliment I gave him but was clearly confused by my statement. He tried to correct me but I emphasized that he looks good in blue and then I walked away. Even as he asked me if I was smoking something as I walked away, we maintained the same friendly manner of connecting to each other as we had established at the beginning of our interaction.

Then I followed my fellow workshopper as he approached a lady by the pool with the same line. She was wearing a blue shirt and he insisted that he really liked her red shirt. Again everybody was all smiles, but she was clearly confused and was trying to get to the bottom of why he was saying what he was saying. She started asking him questions about himself and seemed genuinely interested in forging a connection. I then tried to provide her some empathy and understanding about her confusion about how my friend was not making any sense. I offered-- “Don’t mind my friend. He had a long night. He just rode in on his camel from Wisconsin.” Then the lady asked what he was smoking but proceeded to invite us to sit down and talk with her some more. I could tell that she really liked my fellow workshopper and really wanted us to stay and chat despite our crazy talk. What I learned through my first person experience and my third person observation was that when you bring the good energy of love and connection to the conversation, it really does not matter what you say in words. Us: blah blah blah crazy talk. Them (hotel employee and lady by the pool): OK—I love and accept you anyways!

This was definitely a good experience to have because it is an area that I would like to develop more fully. In “real life” projecting myself in a positive loving way can be challenging when I am invested in the outcome of a particular interaction. Doing this crazy exercise gave me practice in projecting good energy when I did not feel inhibited by having something on the line. I would like to get to the point that when I make “crazy” requests from people I can internalize the same approach that I used and saw modeled by the other workshopper into interactions that scare me more. Right now for me that means making requests pertaining to my Sound Sensitivity problem. I know that I have it in me. Right before going to the workshop, I had a situation in which I was in a state of euphoria and was able to boldly discuss my feelings about gum chewing with a gum chewer without coming off as offensive. Now a month and a half after the workshop, I would love to be able to tell you that I approach my Sound Sensitivity issue with this same type of exuberant humor every time, but I am just not there yet. I have approached other formerly tense interactions in a more positive way however—so you could say I am practicing with lighter weights. My goal is really to maintain that state of love and connection regardless of what the other person does. Whether I make wacked out statements to other people or request that they not chew gum around me, their response is theirs and not mine and I am free to respond to their response, but it is futile to try and control it. Then again, where there is true love and connection, i.e. some type of rapport has been established there is more space for “requests’ (not demands) to be heard and granted.

Suggested “To Do” List

Join Facebook and befriend people from “Steve Pavlina Conscious Growth Workshop Attendees” group. That way you can stay in constant contact with like-minded people who reinforce your planet B and it is a lot of fun! It is really wonderful to follow the accomplishments of fellow consciousness folks.

Arrive early and leave late—I had many great social interactions, before, during and after the workshop. I arrived Wednesday evening before the workshop and stayed for one week. On Thursday I met two workshoppers over lunch and then in the evening there was a very large gathering of workshoppers. After the workshop I enjoyed a hike at Red Rock Canyon and a Toastmasters meeting on Monday evening with my Australian, Canadian, and German buddies. It was nice to mingle with the Las Vegas natives as well! Interesting bunch—not everybody in Las Vegas was trying to give me one of those porn cards they hand out on the Strip! I digress. I also enjoyed a nice helicopter ride on Tuesday with my new friends and wished I did not have to go back to Madison on Wednesday because I would have liked to take more trips with my great new friends from all over the world.

Expect to socialize with your fellow workshoppers in the evenings during the workshop as well. This includes walking up and down the Strip, going out to eat, going to shows, and yes, even playing a little blackjack. I wish I had spent more time in “old” Las Vegas, so I will during CGW #2.

Bring your favorite lotion—I was passing my jojoba oil around because those of us not native to Las Vegas were having major issues with dry skin and I am not just talking about our hands. My legs looked so weird—red, cracked and just really dry!

Do your research and planning ahead of time—you will get better deals on trips if you plan them ahead of time. Use the forums to find others from the conference that are interested in the same type of travel as you are. Do not try and rent a car at the last minute. We tried doing this for our day trip to the Red Rock Canyon and all the rental cars were taken. Also if you are on a special diet, do your research and hooking up with the right people ahead of time. That way you will not be tempted to stray from your plan. I only discovered at the end of the trip how easy it was to get to Whole Foods using the bus system. You can very economically purchase a multi-day bus ticket. There are many people at the conference that are interested in eating a vegan diet or a raw vegan diet—so there will be others who you can pool resources with to get to some of these places. There also was some talk about having food delivered from one of the two raw food restaurants in Las Vegas. I am considering renting a refrigerator and stocking up on fruits and vegetables from Whole Foods. I found that the breakfast buffets contained many temptations and a lot of the fruit came out of a can anyway. Also, this strategy would give me more freedom to eat lightly from restaurants I go to with other for the purpose of socializing by supplementing meals with high quality foods that I have pre-selected to be on my menu.

Plan your experience and plan to experience. See you at CGW #2!